Question: I have had these sleep paralysis experiences all my life…since I was a child. But somehow, I was newer scared or terrified because of that. Yes it was, and still is annoying, somehow scary experience, but I was/am always able to fight back and repel that “attack”.
And, I must say that experience looks/feels exactly like that – as an spirito-enegetic attack/some kind of violation.There is no other way to describe it.I honestly don’t know if this is something good or bad, but in my guts I feel that I should fight back and never give in. It is more sinister to me in its appearance than benevolent, so I treat it that way.I experimented few times with “giving in” (just letting myself go), and It was not pleasant.I had experience like I am being lifted in the air and being spanned violently around… I will share few interesting observations that my shade additional light, and ad to the overall pool of information that one can find here.1. Contrary to the majority of testimonies here, I was/am newer paralyzed when I have that experiences. Why? I don’t quite know. The episodes are happening exactly as with majority of people here; prior to falling to sleep. They are very vivid, very violent and very sudden…but the moment they start, I am able to regain full control of my body at moment’s notice (if I want to). I think that have something to do with the fact that I am dealing with that kind of experiences all my life (very often), and somehow I have gain instinctive control of that awake/sleep border state, which gives me enough confidence to fight/deal with that without fear.2. The type of attacks that I experience have changed over time. First I had intense experience of something trying to enter into me through my abdomen. I will suddenly hear loud voices, screams, unsettling whispers and strange hissing (snake like) sounds. My perception was always of multiple entities circling around my body, and I instinctively felt that there is some kind of hierarchy among them. Majority of that entities seems like some kind
of support to a main “Bos-like” entity which was/is trying to violate me/enter in to me. For decades, it was always abdomen.Nowdays it is from the back. Sometimes I feel like someone is pressing its body against my back and tries to enter into me, and sometimes like he/it is putting its arms around me, and than tries to merge with me…The very act of “entering” will send currents of intense nerve energy all over my body, and my fighting back, will ease that sensation.I have to mark, that protecting my abdomen was much easier, than protecting my back. I can still repeal the attack, but it will take me more time and effort.But As scary as it sounds, I was/am always able to win the fight. I will forcefully, mentally order all of them to back off, occasionally utter some prayers, and contract my abdomen…and that was enough. I also have strange ability of opening/shut down my minds-eye (no other way to describe it), and control the visual sensation accompanying the entire experience. If I somehow “let go” I will usually “see” unsettling shapes and strange forms moving around me…scary faces, etc…But if I keep my “minds-eye” closed, the shapes will randomly flash – here and there- but it will be less unsettling – which I prefer.The moment all of the fuss will end, I will effortlessly fall asleep.3. Since I travel a lot, and sleep in different places (on occasions in different continents), experiences have followed me all over the place. So, I am sure that this has nothing to do with the place where I sleep, but with the person itself.The intensity and quality of experience is unchanged. 4. I like to sleep, have pleasant dreams, and have no trouble falling into the sleep. Ever.I have no anxieties regarding above experiences whatsoever (although they are quite intense, and unsettling…when they occur).If it means anything; I am healthy, have never used drugs, don’t smoke or drink, I live healthy life…had strong spiritual urges/inclinations my all life. I believe in Jesus, and trying my best to live pure, strong life. Regards,Leonard